My new blog is Paint The Blog Orange…. For those of you who wish to switch with me you are more than welcome to. As well, you may want to update your blogrolls if you have me linked.

Its been fun while it lasted in the Orange Maze, but change is sometimes a good thing. I really needed a change of setting with the recent happenings around.

Well see you in my new place!

–om

There has been many things that have been going on but I won’t repeat it because I have mentioned it in my new blog that I created last week. I am in setup mode so its not officially open but thanks to an anonymous (if that’s how you spell it) it opened my eyes that there are truly people that read but not necessarily comment. Its hard to know how is really reading or who is just passing by and not coming back. I really do appreciate that comment, not to take away the thunder of those friends of mine who regularly do so.

Honestly, if I was going to close down the blog and never come back it would be for a reason other than how many comments I receive. I did not feel the urge to continue on this blog for many good and not so decent memories it reminded me of.  I got the extra boost in creating a new blog when I finally thought of a new name for the new site.

My intentions are to start new with no past recollection that this blog existed. Meaning I am not exporting posts here all the way to the new place.  Its not that I want to forget my past, I want to learn and move forward from it.  This is the penultimate post I am going to do here at the Orange Maze. I am shedding my skin and will move officially to my new blog once I announce it.  I won’t erase this blog so dont worry.

For those that are curious on what the new name for my blog is…. its still associated with Orange. New layout and all that jazz.

Until Next Time… This has been your Orange Update!

–om

P.S. Thanks again to all of you who have been with me throughout my journey. Sometimes you need reminders from a different point of view. I appreciate that comment a lot, you know who you are.

Its been ages since I updated this thing I call my blog.  I dont know what’s in me but I just dont find this as fun as it used to be.  I am gone for almost a month but I have NOOOO comments whatsoever.  I love comments because I get to know new people and blogging is the best way to do that.  I have tried looking for buddies to talk to online in AIM but no matter what the initial intentions are, the lifespan of a friendship or converstaion is very slim.  The only friend I speak to confidently came from the blogosphere and its been great.  We went through alot together… Heartbreaks, Crushes, Conversations… The list goes on.

Its no secret that the peak of my blogging career was long gone and its been downhill since a feud between two blogging friends split the blogroll I had in Blogger.  As much as I dont want this as a popularity oriented site, this blog can only thrive with great intentions with lots of people viewing, asking, commenting and other interactive things with me.

You dont have to be Gay or Bisexual to comment and get a reply, but I mostly target the homosexual audience of mine because of what I am going through now.

Its sad to know that I may not get any responses with this blog post and that if I have decided to pull the plug that no one will notice and simply dont care as much. I may sound silly but my driving factor in blogging was the interactions with different people. I have no fuel to go on.

I tease about almost forgetting I had a blog in the first place. But I ain’t joking when I thought of shutting this blog down and creating a new one once I was ready.  This blog has served its purpose and its becoming more like a white elephant. The blog is still here, but its no longer needed or wanted.  I no longer care to blog as much in here for the fact that I can’t find anything that can motivate me to continue. Sometimes change is needed; to live for the future and not dwell on the past.

I am ready to move on and for those that want to follow up can find me in another location if I am no longer here.

Take it easy….

–om

Well its that time again where I give a nice little update on whats going on around me…

In Life… I am doing better with the break up. I have taken the next step and went to AIM to chat with different people. They don’t have chat rooms which I first thought was a downer but I have tried the new message boards to post a thread with my IM Screen Name and its been great. Its better than the chat rooms by a ten fold for the simple fact that I post what type of conversation I want to have and people IM to do just that. The AIM chat rooms are notorious for scandals and solicitors of sex. I am not going on that road…

In Sports… David Beckham signed with the LA Galaxy soccer club. I will surely enjoy him being in America. He is a very attractive athlete I might add. He is very appealing to men and women… He is that good.

In addition… The reason why I named this edition of my update the Insomniac is that I am deprived from my sleep from all the midnight escapades I have had meeting new people online. It surely feels good to move on and forget what I need to forget about.

Until next time…. This has been your Orange Update!

–om

I know you think that I shouldn’t still love you or tell you that
but If I didn’t say it well I’d still have felt it, where’s the sense in that
I promise I’m not trying to make your life harder
or return to where we were but

I will go down with this ship and I won’t put my hands up and surrender
there will be no white flag above my door, I’m in love and always will be…

…and when we meet, which I’m sure we will
all that was there, will be there still
I’ll let it pass, and hold my tongue
and you will think, that I’ve moved on

I will go down with this ship and put my hands up and surrender
there will be no white flag above my door, I’m in love and always will be

This is my anthem of the New Year just for the fact that I am moving on (but still “licking my wounds” to heal from the first breakup). Ohh my, there I go again, talking about the break up… Seriously, I am sorry but I just think that my blog is here for a reason and its to serve the purpose for me to rant and relieve myself from the stresses in life. Now I can say that after thinking about life and love and happiness last sunday while I was working…. Getting scared… What do I do now? type of the thoughts… I am moving forward. Like I said before, the fact that classes began after my long break helped me forget the pain from last year.

And I have a new song to consider as my new title track… White Flag. Thank God for Dido.

–om

I have been out and about from school and was not able to work extra because I got an infected wound on my left foot so I have been left with a lot of time to think.  I am still licking off the wounds from my breakup but I am somewhat over it. Not entirely and I will tell you why in a few…

Because of my hiatus, I decided to give everyone a Happy New Year wish.  2006 was a year to remember for many personal and not-so-personal reasons. I would do the year-end recap but I don’t live in the past and I am sure all of you guys are up to date with all the newsworthy happenings of the previous year.

Neil Patrick Harris, Lance Bass, and I came out to the world (really… I only came out to one friend and you should know the story). In reality, it was not a coming out that I expereinced because I am still in limbo now and probably more than ever on what I prefer sexually.

On the other hand, Clay Aiken and Johnny (Flamboyant Figure Skater) Weir are still closet freaks.But they will have their time of attention when they decide too if they are.

This year I wish all of you the best! For the sake of humanity and for peace to prevail around here. I wish for tolerance and respect for one another and self-respect.

Personally, I will stay single for a while. I don’t know if my next partner will be a guy or a girl. I know that my last relationship has been taxing on me and I want a break from the dating scene and return to my pre-boyfriend routine when it was me, myself, and I.  The breakup was harder than I thought and it took a while to get over it. It was my first love, for goodness sakes, it was predicatble I was going to be heartbroken gradually after the break. What helped me recover was going back to school and realizing that indeed I WAS heartbroken.

Here’s to a better 2007! Because the only way to live is by learning from the past and living for the future.

–om

Ehhh…it all makes me wonder sometimes why I even bother. I’m not the stereotypical homo and this isn’t the stereotypical “gay” blog. Neither is going to change just to fit any stereotype…

This quote was made by Kahil on blogging. I won’t repeat everything he posted but I agree on his views on how gay bloggers have resorted on nude pics, pornography, gossip, and drama to promote their blog. If you notice the top blogs of Best Gay Blogs end of the year awards are mostly adult-oriented. Now, I am not saying I don’t pay those blogs a visit. I just don’t agree that they are the best of the best.

There are many genuine blogs out there that are classy and very entertaining, funny, thought-provoking and with lots of personality. Those to me are the best gay blogs because they represent the diversity within the gay community. Homosexuals are not all about the stereotypical twinkish flaming queers we see on TV. They are real men and women who happen to love someone of the same gender.

Kahil mentioned he does not fit the gay stereotype, which probably means I am totally out of the gay stereotype manily because I am still not sure who I am and who I love. I know one thing is that for sure I am attracted to men but I am reluctant to declaring anything prematurely.

Anyways… The quote I featured mimics my feelings about blogging right now. I’ll stop blogging before changing anything for the sake of having a few more readers at my blog.

Thanks Kahil.

–om

To all who still stumble in and visit me, Merry Christmas. Hopefully your santa claus gave you what you wished for and more.

Spend it with your loved ones, because the greatest gift (as I have noticed) is the time you’ll spend with them. They can be family, friends, boyfriends/girlfriends, or complete strangers. For me, its my mother and my brother. Especially now when I am still licking off the wounds from what happened earlier. Sadly my friends (the little group that I have) are not enough to bring the joy I really need to wake up from the kink I am feeling. I have tried discussing it with a friend I have not chatted with in a while, but that only made it worst.

So, on this special day celebrating the birth of the savior, Christ, I am spending it with my treasured loved ones because they are the only ones I have right now.

Merry Christmas….. Feliz Navidad

–om

P.S. If this message sounded a bit too somber, I truly apologize.

After two months of love and bliss… A week of a separation… My boyfriend and I decided to mutually break up. I knew it was coming since Monday, when he told me he wanted time to think about continuing the relationship once he moved to Tampa. However, he surprised me with a phone call on Friday to know if I was alright. In that conversation we clarified each others comments from Monday which helped me deal with the news a lot better knowing that if the relationship ended, it was to keep the friendship from turning sour. With the chances of long distance relationships being very, very slim, I thought it was best to end this part of our relationship in great terms.

Instead of him dumping me or I breaking up with him, it was a mutual consensus when I called him earlier today. It was sad, especially when I was thinking of the last time I spent time with him as boyfriends and knowing that from now on… No physical stuff, and no kissing for the fact that now we are great friends. The way it was before we were lovers.

My friendship with him is essential and much more important than having a boyfriend. For that reason I am grateful, I am not as somber as I was earlier this week and I am a newly single guy.

In a way, I kind of missed having the single life. I am sure that in the future, though, I will miss the great “loving” times I had in a committed relationship. I’ll sail that boat when it docks because for now I am taking a break from everything but blogging.

–om

Sure, I have to remind myself that I am not in a break up yet but that has not stopped me from preparing for the worst and hoping for the best. My blog is official break up central until further notice. Mostly because I need something I love to do to keep my mind off of my boyfriend.

The music video by lovely Beyonce is my way to think about the matter but in a positive way. Instead of playing the songs from the last post (about missing him and loving him), I decided to take a positive approach by essentially blaming him.

The situation in the video with Beyonce and her lover (ex-lover) is totally different. My boyfriend has not cheated on me, we are in a homosexual relationship (a great one, nonetheless), and I really don’t blame him for separating or for breaking up the relationship. I truly think if he would have stayed around, or if we had more time together before he moved, it would have worked out fine.

Anyways, I am sure all of you had it with the break up news so I decided to enhance this one by adding the music video for your enjoyment…

[See video after the jump]

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